Mystery Surrounds Fappy The Dolphins SeaWorld Masturbation Arrest Story

It turns out it’s a hoax.

Earlier today, CBS News reported that a Christian anti-masturbation mascot was arrested at SeaWorld for masturbating in public. More specifically, the mascot by the name of Fappy was reportedly seen swimming with dolphins while in his birthday suit, according to SeaWorld employees.

Fappy serves as the mascot for Stop Masturbation Now, a group focusing on the dangers of masturbation (whatever they may be). The group, who is funded by the federal government of America, just wrapped up a 31-city nationwide tour educating children on how dangerous masturbation can be. The identity of the mascot is Paul Horner, a 37-year-old man. He was apparently swimming with nothing on but a dolphin’s head, and furiously masturbating, according to witnesses.

The whole ordeal has been declared fake, from the actual mascot to the film Michael Moore has been teasing, which is a documentary about the anti-masturbation movement and the mascot. News about the film was originally published as a press release on Press Release Distribution, but the post has been taken down.

The release quoted an interview with CNN, who had apparently spoken to Lonnie Childs, president and founder of Stop Masturbation Now, yet the interview is nowhere to be found. The only other website who is reporting this as news is Super Official News, which is a satirical site. While it’s unclear just exactly who is behind this whole ordeal, its motive is to enrage the Westboro Baptist Church. Many fingers have been pointed to Moore, Anonymous, anti-Westboro Baptist Church groups and even the group itself.

The attack, though, could indeed be a direct message to SeaWorld, too. The company has been under fire for its treatment of orcas and its breeding practices. SeaWorld trainers usually masturbate the male whales and inseminate the female whales, forcing them to produce at a much younger age.

Sources: cbsnews.com, dailydot.com

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